1. Is it? is it on your Ipad? Really? You’ve got the recipe for corn bread stuffing on your ipad ….2 is it? Why don’t you eat a box of go fuck yourself.
2. You’re adults who have formed opinions on the Kardashions. That’s awesome.
3. I’m sorry you wrote a bunch of preemptive fan fiction for the now cancelled “The Playboy Club”. Sometimes life doesn’t work out.
4. Why wouldn’t we want to watch a 45 minute power point of you and your friends planking.
5. Gluten? I’ll Gluten you, you son of a bitch, Shut up and eat.
6. Angry Birds? Have I ever heard of Angry Birds? Is that a kind of pogs you ass hat?
7. Have you ever, even one time, had a thought that you did hear from tv, one time? Once? Just one thing.
8. Your baby didn’t say “Daddy” he said “blerpffff” So shut up about it.
9. You made instant stuffing in a $300 baking pan. That’s impressive stuff.
10. This electoral session is an exercise in bad theater and the limits of gullibility. But please, let’s pretend this isn’t bullshit and really get heated about weather Perry is more or less likely to not be the next president than Cain. And For the love of God somebody, stick up for Bachman.